“We’ll crucify the insincere tonight…” – Smashing Pumpkins “Tonight, Tonight!”
Every day, every morning the sun ignites a new day, a new promise. And there are infinite possibilities to everything and for everyone. You know nothing is written in stone; and if you discover it is then you could find a new stone and create your own destiny. Every day, every morning the sun ignites the new, presents you with infinite possibilities.
I know that love is in your mind; your soul desperately desires that compassionate, passionate, compatible and complimentary person to your being, your honest self. Your age dictates your desire. If you’re anything like me then you know that there is another level to achieve that can only really be reached with the union of (in my case) – her and she is the key. And the desire goes deep to the root of you. The introduction and the onset of the rush of ideas, dreams, and everything becomes as intoxicating as the smell of her hair, the taste of her lips, and the weight of her on you, the trueness of complete surrender.
There is a woman I’ve seen. She’s a beautiful woman; carries herself well and perhaps is very approachable; void of façades and heavy layers. Perhaps. And every time I see her she opens the door like the sun opens the day. She probably doesn’t even know it or for that matter that I am really here, daydreaming. It’s like high school all over again. And there was that one time, in a Brooklyn park, when she returned my simple greeting with a “Hi, Ron” or perhaps and more likely it was a simple “Hi”. The prologue of that day started and continued with smiles and the epilogue was like a continual tranquility, an injection of infinite possibilities and future experiences dominated my thoughts and my new old desired goals. I don’t really know much about her; I desperately resist reading into her casual actions or my imagined thoughts during the seemingly consequential encounters. Of course you know it is the imagined reality that makes the daydream addictive and forces the reaching out, the being at the right place at the right time; preparing for that consequential perfect encounter – when she says “yes” to everything that exits from my mouth and mind.
But when the world stops, and I can have my love supreme. You will witness a new, evolved, motivated person. Re-born, revitalized, re – everything will be my new description; my longing adjectives. And there will be the personal sequels that I can reflect on and remember when. And there will be the forward future. We all have the desire, the desire for the true Love Jones, the total rapture of surrendering and standing whole, naked, and honest to someone we will give everything for. You’ve read it before, you see it before. It is Human Nature!
Friends of mine may tell you that I may fall [in love] too easily, to ready. Perhaps it has always been the romantic in my deepest of selves since 7th or 8th grade in that I have desired her. Perhaps it is the beauty I find for in all women. The thirst to have and to hold a single woman, a compliment to my being, a muse to my art and a future mother to my children has always reigned supreme in my life.
And what is a man to do. There are neither numbers to dial nor letters to form words; words to form meaning to type and construct an electronic mail message to deliver to her. And for now it is the old fashioned method that will either unite us or prove to be only my imagined fantasy of a “chanced” meeting. I can only stand in the place or places and hope for a schedule, an opportunity, and a prayer that will unite us for a moment, a conversation, an indescribable moment that will be my sun, my introduction to infinite possibilities.
I understand that with infinite possibilities includes the actuality that my imagined reality may crash into disappointment or lost to the wolves of fear and regret with the simplest bit of real information. And so it is now that I’ve discovered a choice must be made to be bold, rage hard, and extend an invitation to either transform the near infatuation and distance admiration or accept the possible defeat. And just as the day transforms into night, everything comes to an end. There should be no tears to shed or heart to break since it is possible that the sun will come up tomorrow and a new day starts and a new promise is re-born. Every day, every morning the sun ignites the new, presents you with infinite possibilities.
Inspired by Ann
